- 大家好 - 菲比 - Hi, guys. - Hey, Phoebe.
情况如何？ Hey, oh, how did it go?
不是太好 Um, not so good.
他送我到地铁站 并且说 "我们该再这么做" He walked me to the subway and said, "We should do this again."
- 哎呦 - 什么？他说 "我们该再这么做" - Ouch. - What? He said, "We should do it again."
那是件好事吧 That's good, right?
不 简单地翻译 "我们该再这么做" 是指 Uh, no. Loosely translated, "We should do this again," means:
"你再也看不到我的裸体" "You will never see me naked."
从什么时候开始？ Since when?
一直都是这样 那是种约会语言 Since always. It's, like, dating language.
"那与你无关" 意思是 "全都是你的错" You know, like, "It's not you," means, "It is you."
"你是个好人" 意思是 "You're such a nice guy," means:
"我要跟穿着皮衣的酒鬼约会" "I'm gonna be dating leather-wearing alcoholics...
"跟他们抱怨你的事" ...and complaining about them to you."
"我想我们该跟别人交往看看" 意思是指 Or, you know, um, "I think we should see other people," means:
"我已经那么做了" "Ha, ha, I already am."
大家都知道这些事？ And everybody knows this?
对 降低冲击力 Oh, yeah. Cushions the blow.
像是你小的时候 爸妈将你的狗安乐死 Like when you're a kid and your parents put your dog to sleep...
跟你说他逃跑到农场去了 ...and they tell you it went off to live on some farm.
那真的很好笑 不 因为我们的爸妈真的… That's funny. No, because, uh, our parents actually did...
把我们的狗送到农场去 ...uh, send our dog off to live on a farm.
罗斯 Uh, Ross?
康乃狄克州的麦纳农场？ Ha, ha. Hello. The Milner's farm in Connecticut?
麦纳夫妇有座超棒的农场 The Milners, they had this unbelievable farm.
他们养了马跟兔子 他可以追着他们玩 They had horses and rabbits that he could chase.
那是… And it was...
天啊 奇奇 Oh, my God. Chi-Chi.
"知道自己快死掉时 那是什么样的感觉？" "So how does it feel knowing you're about to die?"
典狱长 五分钟后我将不再痛苦 Warden, in five minutes my pain will be over.
但你得一辈子受到良心谴责 知道自己送一个诚实的人去死 But you'll have to live with the knowledge that you sent an honest man to die.
- 那真的很不错 - 是吗？ - Hey, that was really good. - Yeah?
- 对 - 谢了 继续吧 - Yeah. - Thanks. Let's keep going.
好吧 "你要我怎么做？迪蒙" Okay. "So, what do you want from me, Dimon? Huh?"
我只想回我的牢房 因为在我的牢房里 我能抽烟 I just wanna go back to my cell, because in my cell, I can smoke.
"你就抽吧" "Smoke away."
嘿 Heh.
我想这是迪蒙独自在牢房抽烟的原因 I think this is probably why Dimon smokes in his cell alone.
- 什么？ - 手放轻松 - What? - Relax your hand.
手腕下垂 Let your wrist go.
- 别垂得那么低 - 噢 - Not so much. - Whoa.
嘿 Hey.
好吧 试着抽一口 All right. Now try taking a puff.
对 Right.
- 好吧 不 快给我 - 不 我才不要给你烟 - Okay, no, give it to me. - No, no, no. I'm not giving you a cigarette.
没关系的 听着 你要不要这个角色？来吧 No, it's fine. It's fine. Look, do you want to get this part or not? Here.
好吧 别当这是香烟 All right. Now, don't think of it as a cigarette.
当它是从你手里不见的东西 Think of it as the thing that has been missing from your hand.
拿着它 你觉得安心 When you're holding it, you feel right.
- 你觉得圆满 - 你想念它吗？ - You feel complete. - You miss it?
不 不是很想 No, not so much.
好吧 现在抽一口 All right. Now we smoke.
我的天啊 Oh, my God.
中央咖啡厅
不… No, no, no.
他们说那个的长度 跟男人拇指尖 They say it's the same as the distance from the tip of a guy's thumb...
到食指尖的距离一样 ...to the tip of his index finger.
那太夸张了 That's ridiculous.
我可以用另一只手的拇指吗？ Can I use either thumb?
好吧 别告诉我 All right. Don't tell me, don't tell me.
乔伊是无咖啡因的卡布奇诺 Decaf cappuccino for Joey.
黑咖啡 Coffee, black.
拿铁 Latte.
冰茶 And an iced tea.
- 我真的很厉害 - 太好了 非常不错 - I'm getting pretty good at this. - Excellent. That's very good.
我太神了 Good for me.
- 你还好吧 菲比？ - 对 不 那根本不值得… - You okay, Phoebe? - Yeah, no, it's not even worth...
是我的银行 It's my bank.
他们对你做了什么？ What did they do to you?
没事 只不过… 好的 It's nothing, it's just... Okay.
我看邮件时打开他们的月报表 I'm going through my mail, and I open up their monthly "statement."
别激动 Easy.
我的帐户多了五百块 And there's 500 extra dollars in my account.
撒旦的手下又发威了 Oh, Satan's minions at work again.
对 我得去银行跟他们谈 Yes, because now I have to go down there and deal with them...
- 你干嘛要说呢？留下那笔钱 - 那不是我的钱 - What are you talking about? Keep it. - It's not mine.
那不是我赚来的 留下来那笔钱就等于我偷钱 I didn't earn it. If I kept it, it would be like stealing.
对 把它花掉 可以享受血拼乐趣 Yeah, but if you spent it, it would be like shopping.
好的 Okay. Okay.
假设我买了一双很棒的鞋子 Let's say I bought a really great pair of shoes.
你们知道我每跨出一步 会听到什么吗？ Do you know what I'd hear with every step I took?
"不是我的钱" "Not mine. Not mine. Not mine."
即使我开心地飞舞 And even if I was happy, okay, and skipping...
我会听到 "不是我的钱" ...I'd hear, "Not mine. Not mine."
我们同意你的说法 我们了解 We're with you. We got it.
好吧 我无法享受乐趣 那是一大道德考验 Okay, I'd never be able to enjoy it. It'd be like this giant karmic debt.
钱德 你在做什么？ Chandler, what are you doing? Hey.
你在做什么？ What are you doing?
超恶心的 Oh, gross.
- 这是怎么意回事？ - 我在抽烟 - What is this? - I'm smoking. I'm smoking. I'm smoking.
我不相信 三年来你表现很好 I can't believe you. You've been so good for three years.
这是我的奖励 And this is my reward.
等一下 想想上次戒烟时你吃的苦 Hold on a second. Just think about what you went through the last time you quit.
好吧 所以这次我不戒烟 Okay, so this time I won't quit.
- 把烟熄了 - 好吧 我熄了就是 - Put it out. - All right. I'm putting it out.
不 Oh, no.
现在我没办法喝咖啡了 I can't drink this now.
好吧 我要去换衣服 我有约会 All right, I'm gonna go change. I've got a date.
又是亚伦？情况如何？ Is this Alan again? How's it going?
非常不错 你们知道吗 我们相处既愉快又开心 It's going pretty good, you know? It's nice and we're having fun.
- 我们何时能见到这家伙？ - 对 - So when do we get to meet the guy? - Yeah.
让我想一想 今天是星期一 Let's see, today's Monday...
- 永远不可能 - 少来了 - Never. - Come on.
- 不 在史提夫后是不可能了 - 你在胡说什么？ - No, not after what happened with Steve. - What are you talking about?
我们爱史提夫 史提夫超性感 We love Steve. Steve was sexy.
抱歉 Sorry.
我不知道我对他有什么感觉 给我机会弄清楚 Look, I don't know how I feel about him yet. Give me a chance to figure it out.
然后我们能跟他见面？ Well, then can we meet him?
不行 No.
抱歉 Sorry.
为什么我要让他们跟他见面？ Why should I let them meet him?
我带男人回家 五分钟内他们围着他问个不停 I bring a guy home and within five minutes they're all over him.
他们像是土狼 专对弱小猎物下手 I mean, they're like coyotes picking off the weak members of the herd.
听着 对一个什么倒霉事都遇过的人来说 Listen, as someone who's seen more than her share of bad beef...
我想那不算是太糟糕 ...I'll tell you, that is not such a terrible thing.
他们是你的朋友 他们关心你 Come on, they're your friends. They're looking out after you.
我知道 我希望我能带个他们喜欢的男人回家 I know, I know. I wish that once I'd bring a guy home they actually liked.
你知道 如果他们永远不跟这个男的见面 Well, you do realize that the odds of that happening are a little slimmer...
机率会更小的 ...if they never get to meet the guy.
算了吧 罗斯 Let it go, Ross.
是吗？你根本不认识奇奇 Yeah? Well, you didn't know Chi-Chi.
你们都保证吗？ Do you all promise?
- 对 我们保证 我们会很乖的 - 我们保证 - Yeah, we promise. We'll be good. - We promise.
钱德 你保证会很乖吗？ Chandler, do you promise to be good?
你可以进来 但你的烟得放在外面 You can come in, but your filter tip little buddy has to stay outside.
菲比 Hey, Pheebs.
"亲爱的布非小姐 谢谢你通知我们犯了错" "Dear Ms. Buffay: Thank you for calling attention to our error.
"我们将五百块汇到你的帐户 抱歉造成你的不便" We have credited your account $500. We're sorry for the inconvenience...
"希望你收下这个足球电话" ...and hope you'll accept this football phone...
做为我们的免费礼物" 你们能相信吗？ ...as our free gift." Do you believe this?
现在我有一千块跟这个足球电话 Now I have $1000 and a football phone.
你在哪家银行开的户？ What bank is this?
好吧 他来了 Okay, it's him.
- 哪位？ - 亚伦 - Who is it? - Alan.
钱德 他来了 Chandler. He's here.
好了 拜托你们乖一点 Okay, please be good. Please?
记得你们有多么喜欢我 I mean, remember how much you like me.
亚伦 他们是我的朋友 各位 他是亚伦 Hi. Alan, this is everybody. Everybody, this is Alan.
- 嗨 - 嘿 - Hi. - Hey.
我常听到你们的事 I've heard so much about all you guys.
谢谢 明天我再打电话给你 Thanks, I'll call you tomorrow.
好吧 Okay.
好吧 开始批评亚伦 Okay, let's let the Alan-bashing begin.
谁要开第一枪？ Who's gonna take the first shot?
嗯？ Hmm?
来吧 Come on.
我先来 I'll go.
从他一直挑… Let's start with the way he kept picking at...
对不起 我办不到 You know, I'm sorry, I can't do this.
我办不到 我们爱他 Can't do it. We loved him.
- 我们爱他 - 等一下 - We loved him. - Wait a minute.
我们在谈我的约会对象吗？ We're talking about someone that I'm going out with?
- 对 - 你们注意到了吗？ - Yes. - And did you notice?
对 Yeah.
你们知道哪一点最棒吧？他的笑容有点坏坏的 Know what was great? The way his smile was kind of crooked.
对 像鞋子里的男人 Yes, yes. Like the man in the shoe.
什么鞋子？ What shoe?
童谣里的歌词 From the nursery rhyme.
"有个坏男人 带着坏坏的笑容" "There was a crooked man who had a crooked smile...
"他在鞋子里住了一阵子" ...who lived in a shoe for a while..."
我想… So I think Alan...
把亚伦作为标竿 ...will become the yardstick...
用来评估你未来所有的男朋友 ...against which all future boyfriends will be measured.
什么未来的男朋友？ What future boyfriends?
不 我想就是他了 No, no. I think this could be, you know, "it."
- 真的吗？ - 对 - Really? - Oh, yeah.
我会嫁给他 因为他的表情 跟大卫•赫索霍夫一样 I'd marry him just for his David Hasselhoff impression alone.
你们知道我在派对上会怎么做吧？ You know I'm gonna be doing that at parties, right?
- 你们知道我最喜欢他哪一点吗？ - 什么？ - You know what I like most about him? - What?
他让我喜欢我自己 The way he makes me feel about myself.
对 Yeah.
嗨 Hi.
比赛还好吧？ How was the game?
那个嘛… Well...
- 我们赢了 - 我们赢了 谢谢 太棒了 - We won! - We won! Thank you! Yeah.
太棒了 我有个问题 怎么可能呢？ Fantastic. I have one question: How is that possible?
- 亚伦 - 他太不可思议了 - Alan. - He was unbelievable.
他跟兔宝宝卡通里 每个位置都是兔宝宝一样 He was like that Bugs Bunny cartoon where Bugs is playing all the positions.
但他不是兔宝宝 一垒 亚伦 二垒 亚伦 But instead of Bugs, it was first base, Alan. Second base, Alan...
他让我们成为真正的球队 I mean, it was like he made us into a team.
对 我们真的让那些东正教犹太人珠宝商 Yep. We sure showed those Hasidic jewelers...
- 知道我们多会打垒球 - 太棒了 - ...a thing or two about softball. - Nice.
我能问你们一个问题吗？ Can I ask you guys a question?
你们会不会觉得亚伦有时候… Do you ever think that Alan is maybe sometimes...
- 什么？ - 我不知道 有点太亚伦了 - What? - I don't know. A little too Alan?
不 那是不可能的 他不可能会太亚伦 Oh, no. That's not possible. You can never be too Alan.
对 我们爱的是亚伦的内在 Yeah, it's his innate Alan-ness that we adore.
- 我就蛮想有一加仑的亚伦 - 噢 - I, personally, could have a gallon of Alan. - Oh!
- 莉兹 - 怪女孩 - Hey, Lizzy. - Hey, Weird Girl.
- 我帮你买了字母汤 - 你把元音挑出来了吗？ - I brought you alphabet soup. - Did you pick out the vowels?
对 但我留下Y 因为 "有时候非￥不可" Yes, but I left in the Y's. Because, you know, "Sometimes Y."
我还要给你一样东西 Um, I also have something else for you.
盐脆薄饼干 Saltines?
不 你要一千块跟足球电话吗？ No, but would you like $1000 and a football phone?
什么？ What?
天啊 Oh, my God.
- 天啊 里面是真的钱 - 我知道 - Oh, my God. There's really money in here. - I know.
怪女孩 你在做什么？ Weird Girl, what are you doing?
我要你收下它 我不要这些钱 Oh, I want you to have it. I don't want it.
不 我得给你一样东西 No, no. I have to give you something.
没关系的 你不必… No, it's fine. You don't...
你要我的锡箔纸帽吗？ Do you want my tinfoil hat?
不 你需要它 没关系的 谢谢 No, because you need that. No, it's okay. Thanks.
拜托 让我帮你做些事 Please. Let me do something.
好吧 听我说 Okay, all right. I'll tell you what.
你请我喝杯汽水 我们就扯平了 好吗？ You buy me a soda and then we're even. Okay?
- 好的 - 好的 - Okay. - Okay.
不用找了 Keep the change.
谢谢你 莉兹 Thanks, Lizzy.
你真的不想吃麻花饼？ Sure you don't want a pretzel?
- 不 我不饿 谢谢 - 再见 - No, I'm fine. Thanks. - See you.
哈 Huh.
一根拇指？ A thumb?
呃 Ew.
我知道 我一打开就看到它 I know, I know. I opened it up and there it was...
漂浮在汽水里 就像是有人要搭便车一样 ...just floating in there, like this tiny little hitchhiker.
或许这是个比赛 你得收集五根手指 Maybe it's a contest, you know? Like "Collect all five."
有人想看一下吗？ Does, um, anyone wanna see?
不 谢谢 No, thanks.
- 别那么做 少来了 - 别闹了 - Oh, hey, don't do that. Come on. - Cut that out.
那比拇指更糟糕 It's worse than the thumb.
这太不公平了 Hey, this is so unfair.
- 为什么不公平？ - 我有个缺点 没什么大不了的 - Why is it unfair? - So I have a flaw. Big deal.
乔伊老是按压手指不讨厌吗？ Like Joey's constant knuckle-cracking isn't annoying?
罗斯说起来会咬文嚼字 And Ross, with his over-pronouncing every single word.
摩妮卡笑的时候会发出怪声 And Monica, with that snort when she laughs.
我是说那到底是怎么一回事？ I mean, what the hell is that thing?
我接受那些缺点 为什么你们不接受这样的我？ I accept all those flaws. Why can't you accept me for this?
按压手指会困扰大家 还是只有他？ Does the knuckle-cracking bother everybody, or just him?
那个嘛… Well...
没有它 我可以过得更好 ...I could live without it.
唔 Huh.
它有点讨厌或跟菲比咬头发一样？ Well, is it, like, a little annoying? Or is it like when Phoebe chews her hair?
不 别听他的 菲比 好吗？我觉得那很可爱 Now, don't listen to him, Pheebs, all right? I think it's endearing.
真的吗？ Oh, you do, do you?
发音标准不是件坏事 You know, there's nothing wrong with speaking correctly.
一点都没错 Indeed there isn't.
我该回去工作了 I should really get back to work.
不然有人会拿到他们点的东西 Yeah, otherwise someone might get what they actually ordered.
真相大白 有人说了实话 Oh. The hair comes out and the gloves come off.
你跟你朋友喜欢的男人约过会吗？ Did you ever go out with a guy your friends all really like?
不 No.
好吧 我朋友真的喜欢跟我约会的男人 Okay. Well, I'm going out with a guy my friends all really like.
你是指那些土狼吗？ We talking about the coyotes here?
好吧 有只牛逃过一劫 Heh. All right. A cow got through.
你能相信吗？ Can you believe it?
那像是… 你知道吗？ It's just, you know what?
我一点感觉都没有 I just don't feel the thing.
他们感觉很棒 我一点感觉都没有 I mean, they feel the thing. I don't feel the thing.
甜心 你应该一直… Honey, you should always...
都有感觉的 ...feel the thing.
听着 如果那是你对那家伙的感觉 摩妮卡 甩掉他 Listen, if that's how you feel about the guy, Monica, dump him.
我知道 那真的很难 I know, it's just gonna be really hard.
对 他是大人了 他会释怀的 Yeah, he's a big boy. He'll get over it.
不 他会没事的 我担心其他五个人 No, he'll be fine. It's the other five I'm worried about.
你尊重你的身体吗？ Do you have any respect for your body?
你知道你对自己做了什么吗？ Don't you realize what you're doing to yourself?
我有了你们跟癌症 Hey, you know, I've had it with you and your cancer...
肺气肿及心脏病 ...and your emphysema and your heart disease.
抽烟很酷 你们知道的 The bottom line is, smoking is cool, and you know it.
钱德 Ahem. Chandler?
是亚伦 他要跟你说话 It's Alan. He wants to speak to you.
真的吗？是吗？ Really? He does?
兄弟 有什么事吗？ Hey, buddy. What's up?
她跟你说了？ Oh, she told you about that, huh?
对 我偶尔会抽 对 我正在抽 Well, yeah. I have one now and then. Well, yeah, now.
没那么糟糕 Well, it's not that bad...
一点都没错 Well, that's true.
天啊 没有人那么跟我说过 Gee, you know, no one's ever put it like that before.
好吧 谢谢 Well, okay. Thanks.
天啊 他真的很厉害 God, he's good.
可惜他不是女人 If only he were a woman.
对 Yeah.
羊排 Oh, Lamb Chop.
那只袜子有多旧了？ How old is that sock?
如果我手里存着袜子三十年 它也会说话 If I had a sock on my hand for 30 years, it'd be talking too.
好吧 我想有人该换尼古丁贴月了 Okay, I think it's time to change somebody's nicotine patch.
嘿 Hey.
乔伊人呢？ Where's Joey?
乔伊吃掉我最后一块口香糖 我杀了他 Joey ate my last stick of gum, so I killed him.
你觉得那是不对的吗？ Do you think that was wrong?
- 我想他在对面 - 谢谢 - I think he's across the hall. - Thanks.
好了 There you go.
现在我开心得要命 Ooh, I'm alive with pleasure now.
菲比 你要吃剩下的果酱馅饼吗？ Hey, Pheebs, you gonna have the rest of that Pop Tart?
谁要吃剩下的果酱馅饼？ Does anyone want the rest of this Pop Tart?
我想吃 Hey, I might.
抱歉 I'm sorry.
汽水公司的人 要为拇指的事赔我七千块 You know, those stupid soda people gave me $7000 for the thumb.
- 天啊 - 七千块？ - Oh, my God. - Seven thousand dollars?
我到那里的路上踩到口香糖 And on my way over here, I stepped in gum.
这个世界到底是怎么了？ What is up with the universe?
发生了什么事？ What's going on?
没事 我只是想跟大家一起聚聚 Nothing. I just think it's nice when we're all here together.
如果大家有时间穿内裤会更棒 It's even nicer when everyone gets to wear their underwear.
- 乔伊 - 噢 - Uh, Joey... - Oh.
- 好了 - 别这样 - Okay. - Oh, come on.
拜托 各位 我们得谈一谈 Please, guys, we have to talk.
等一下 我有种似曾相识的感觉 Wait, wait. I'm getting a déjà vu.
不 我想太多了 No, I'm not.
- 好吧 我们得谈一谈 - 这就对了 - All right, we have to talk. - There it is.
好吧 这跟亚伦有关 Okay, it's about Alan.
我该跟你们说一件事 There's something you should know.
天啊 要这么说并不容易 Oh, man, there's really no easy way to say this. Uh...
我决定跟亚伦分手 I've decided to break up with Alan.
你有了别人？ Is there somebody else?
不 那只是… No, no, no. It's just...
感觉会变 人是会变的 ...you know, things change. People change.
我们没变 We didn't change.
就这样？一切结束了？ So that's it? It's over?
就那样？ Just like that?
我好不容易打开心房 You know, you let your guard down.
真的开始关心别人 我只是… You know, you start to really care about someone, and I just...
- 听着 我可以继续假装… - 好的 - Look, I could go on pretending... - Okay.
不 那对我不公平 No. No, that wouldn't be fair to me...
对亚伦或你们都不公平 ...it wouldn't be fair to Alan, or to you.
对 谁要公平呢？ Yeah, well, who wants fair?
我只希望一切回到从前 I mean, I just want things back, you know, the way they were.
- 我很抱歉 - 她觉得抱歉 我好过多了 - I'm sorry. - Oh, she's sorry. I feel better.
我不敢相信 I just can't believe this.
快过节了 我要他跟我家人见面 I mean, with the holidays coming up. I wanted him to meet my family.
我会认识别人的 还会有别的亚伦 I'll meet someone else. There'll be other Alans.
对 Yeah, right.
- 你们没事吧？ - 我们会没事的 - Are you guys gonna be okay? - Hey, hey. We'll be fine.
我们只需要一点时间 We're just gonna need a little time.
我了解 I understand.
哇 Wow.
- 我真的很抱歉 - 对 我是说我也有点抱歉 - I'm really sorry. - Yeah. I mean, I'm sorry too.
我得说我是松了一口气 But I gotta tell you, I'm a little relieved.
- 松了一口气？ - 对 - Relieved? - Yeah, well...
跟你在一起 我很闹心 ...I mean, I had a great time with you.
我受不了你的朋友们 I just can't stand your friends.
记得我们到中央公园租船的事吗？ Remember when we went to Central Park and rented boats?
那真的很好玩 That was fun.
对 他划起船来就像维京人 Yeah. He could row like a Viking.
- 嗨 - 嗨 - Hi. - Hi.
结果怎么样？ So how'd it go?
- 你们知道的 - 他有提到我们吗？ - You know. - Did he mention us?
他说他会想念你们的 He says he's really gonna miss you guys.
你真的很不好过吧？ You had a rough day, huh?
- 你才不会懂 - 过来 - Oh, you have no idea. - Come here.
- 够了 我要抽烟 - 不… - That's it. I'm getting cigarettes. - No, no, no.
我不在乎 I don't care. I don't care.
游戏结束 我得抽烟 Game's over. I'm weak. I've gotta smoke. I've gotta have the smoke.
只要你不再抽烟 我给你七千块 If you never smoke again, I'll give you $7000.
好吧 Yeah, all right.